Question

read the following excerpt from a student essay. how can the writer best improve his or her sentence fluency? why does chopping an onion make your eyes tear up? the reason has to do with chemicals. onions contain high levels of sulfur, and when you cut the onion, enzymes that were separated within the onion come into contact with the sulfur to create compounds called sulfenic acids, which then turn into a chemical called syn-propanethial-s-oxide. this chemical easily turns into a vapor, travels through the air, and irritates your eyes, making them tear. by improving the transitions between sentences by simplifying a long, complicated sentence

Explanation:

The essay has an overly long, dense second sentence that packs multiple connected ideas (onion sulfur content, enzyme-sulfur reaction, sulfenic acid formation, syn-propanethial-S-oxide creation) into one. Splitting this into shorter, focused sentences will make the explanation flow more smoothly and improve readability, which directly enhances sentence fluency. The existing transitions between the core sentences are already logical, so simplifying the long complex sentence is the better improvement.

Answer:

by simplifying a long, complicated sentence